TEACHING CHILDREN TO RESPECT THE RIGHTS OF OTHERS
When children are small, they believe that their wishes are the most important. They believe that they should get what they want and that their feelings are what counts. Learning to respect the rights of others is a difficult lesson to learn.
Here are some helpful hints you can incorporate into your program to teach the children they need to respect other people’s rights:
· Give clear explanations. It’s important for children to understand that their every wish cannot be your command.
For example: When you are in the middle of preparing lunch, and a child wants you to read a story to them, explain why you cannot stop what you are doing and read to her right now.
Also give clear explanations when you expect children to respect the wishes of other children in the program.
For example: Mary wants Terry to play with her now. Explain to Mary why Terry does not want to play right now. “Terry cannot play with you right now because she is looking at a picture book, she will be ready to play later in the day.”
· Respect the rights of each child. Teaching children how to take turns and share are ways to show respect for the rights of the other children. Sharing is a wonderful concept to teach the children but beware of infringing on the rights of a child while attempting to demonstrate sharing.
For example: Taking a toy from one child and giving it to another when trying to demonstrate sharing. This could lead to the child feeling angry that you sided with the other child.
· Respect for other’s belongings. Teach the children to ask permission before taking something that belongs to another child.
· Respect young children’s feelings. You cannot expect a young child to respect or begin to understand the feelings of others, if that child feels his or her own feelings are not respected.
For example: A child who feels sad and cries should never be called a ‘crybaby’ by you or anyone in the program.
Do not speak about a child in their presence as if they weren’t there. When you do this, you are teaching a child it is appropriate to ignore the feeling of others.
· Identify feelings others may be experiencing. Teaching children to respect the rights of others requires that they learn how others feel.
For example: Eric takes Bryce’s toy away and Bryce cries. Ask Eric “Bryce is crying, how do you think he is feeling right now?”
You could also teach Bryce to tell Eric how he feels. “I am really sad because you took my toy away from me.”
A great way of teaching children to recognize a feeling is to discuss how characters in a story you read are feeling at different times in the story.
· Set a respectful example. Teach children to comfort another child when they are sad. What you say to a young child does not have as much impact as what you do.
For example: You ask a young child to acknowledge the rights or feelings of another child. Then she sees you snapping at your spouse or a neighbor, this sends a message that such behaviors are acceptable.
As a provider, you may worry that the efforts you make in your childcare program can be undermined by outside influences. It is important to understand that you are able to make an impression on the children. As a family childcare provider, you have the unique opportunity to teach by demonstrating a positive example. When you give the child a kind smile or a gentle touch, you are setting a positive example for the children.